Dreams and Things

Last night's dreams were critical of my principal and school. Teachers are the only ones to get the feedback, and it's usually not timely or directly offered. Which makes it feel like people are just judging and not trying to help.

Yesterday was the craziest: I have a student who is leaving school because he has cancer. He is going to be homeschooled while he goes through treatment. These kids have no idea how to handle it. Another girl--who I know was a cutter last year--told me her cousin killed herself by overdosing on pills. And another--all in the same class--was crying because she was put on the 3rd string basketball team, even tho she is far and away the strongest player in the school. Because she has a bad attitude. From last season. I don't agree.

We are here to help these kids develop. We must help nurture as well as teach content. They cannot be separated, and yet, so many of these kids complain that their teachers lack the ability or willingness to connect and have any empathy for what they are going through. This week as we've been writing, kids have had a voice, much more of a voice than usual, and I have loved my job. Train them to find the warm up. Give a simple direction for them to follow at the start. While they work, I hand out Tiger Tickets (need to find a system for how to reward them in class). Pair-Share is next. This is a great place to start with journaling so that I incorporate daily writing practice. I want this to be a part of everyday life in my class. Build community. Build empathy. Create a safe space and teach these practices of self-awareness in class.

The way I dealt with my arch-nemesis Jennifer. She talked during my entire class. I asked her to go outside. I asked her, "What do you want to feel like when you are walking out of my class to go home today?" Totally baffled her. She said, "Good." And I agreed. We both want to feel good at the end of class. It's simple. We both have to get our needs met, but we will have conflict if we never think about the other person as important as yourself. I just want to be a force for good. I want them to learn how to write and read, but that's the easy part. It's the soul stuff that requires me to grow as a human being on this earth. 

I feel so privileged to be here. I feel so privileged to do this work and to be entrusted with these kids. So much gratitude for my life and experiences. So much amazement that I am here.